The weather in March was lovely. Now we have entered April the weather has turned for the worse. Hail, thunder and torrential rain coupled with colder than average temperatures can mean only one thing. Yes, it’s Car Boot season once again. Ah yes you can almost smell the hotdogs and burgers from the comfort of your own room. Never has there been more fun from being crammed into a tiny field at 7am on a Sunday morning than by going to a booty.

A perfect site for sore retro eyes - there be bargains to be had out there !

So here are a few tips to keep you on your guard during the next few months :

1. Always take a small bag or rucksack with you. I made this mistake many times believing that it was either too late in the season to get any bargains or there won’t be any booters around because it was holiday season. Never underestimate what might be there.
2. Park as close as you can to the car boot as is possible. Nothing hurts more than carrying round a boxed Nintendo Gamecube Donkey Konga set, as I experienced 3 years ago. You can’t always park close but if you do make a large purchase like that don’t man up and think that because you only have a few rows to go it won’t hurt. It does.
3. Get there early. I know some of these things start at stupid o’clock but even arriving an hour after the boot starts means you are likely to have missed something. These places are full of traders and specialists who will be there when Dawn cracks. If you want the best stuff, get there early.
4. Get in early. Almost the same as above. Don’t leave something to chance as in “I’ll come back later”. If it is something you want, buy it there and then. It won’t be there later.
5. Use your own judgement. If you think you are paying too much for something then say so. It’s always best to barter, after all that is what car booting is all about. In most cases the seller will have added a couple of quid to the asking price so if you knock them down they are still getting a good deal. I should take my own advice sometimes – I tend to consider the price and think if it’s fair I’ll pay it. If it’s too much I’ll walk away rather than haggle.
6. Watch out for traders. You’ll know who they are. These are the ones who have priced high and won’t move on it because then you will be eating into their profit margin. Occasionally you can get a good deal if you buy a few things but on most occasions if it is priced highly it is priced to sell and not to be knocked down.
7. Check the condition. This is particularly with disc based games. No one is going to shout at you if you want to look at the state of a disc. If they do, then they have something to hide. Always check the contents of the box too because you might not be getting what you think you are buying, but then again I have had the odd bonus find with an extra disc inside.
8. Be sensible. Nothing pisses people off more at a car boot than someone being aggressive when it comes to haggling on prices. It’ll get you short shrift and leaves a nasty taste in everyone’s mouth. Bite your tongue if someone is being a wanker and move on, don’t get involved and start anything. It will only end in tears. Some of these places are very well marshalled and some I have been to have police officers close at hand.

There are also a couple of tips if you fancy parting with any of your collection :

1. Be realistic with your pricing. Not everyone goes to a booty with £100 in their pocket so just consider this if you think marking up your dusty PS2 with a few FIFA and WWE games at £25 is going to attract many buyers. It won’t and you’ll end up taking it back home. If you want to make that sort of profit then shove it on eBay. Go to a booty, price sensibly so you make a few quid and enjoy it.
2. Beware the trader. We’ve touched on these guys before and they will become very persistent in wanting your stuff before it goes on sale. As soon as you arrive they’ll be hovering round your car, peeking inside and asking questions. You can either do two things – give in or sit inside and wait until they have gone. They’ll want your stuff and will pay only a fraction what you want for it, and you will guarantee walking around afterwards they’ll be selling it on their stall – at a much higher price than you sold it to them. Hold your ground and be strong.
3. Be kind. If someone is trying to rip you off – and this applies to selling as well – just a few kind words and send them on their way. The last thing you want to do is get into a scrap at a booty. If they try and knock down your prices, go with it and drop if you can. If you can’t, say so and be honest. If they get all aggressive about it, just be polite. Don’t let people bully you either – after all unless you are trading or selling for charity you have your own limits set and if they don’t agree with them that is their problem.
4. Do your research. It’s always best to try a few boot fairs as a buyer and see how busy they are. Do some internet searches as well and see if you can find popular sites. The last thing you should do is join a gaming forum and ask people where good ones are. Chances are most retro gamers won’t reveal where they go for fear of an influx of buyers. There is, most definitely, a difference between standing in a field and making a decent wad and standing in a field and making 12 sales all day, believe me I had the latter happen because I didn’t do my research. A good source of information is the local free paper as there always a few adverts about upcoming and long running events

So there you go. This is not a definitive list by any standards, nor should it be taken as gospel. This is simply me passing on my experiences to you. The best advice of all, buying or selling, is to simply go and have a good day and pick up some great bargains or make a few quid.

Now get out there and grab a bargain before they are all gone.....or I get there first

What can be done to prevent the fire sale that sparked the collapse of the GAME group ?

So what has GAME got to do going forward. From the suggestion box these spurt forth like a spurting thing :

• Shutting so many stores was necessary to reduce costs. You cannot continue having 2-3 shops of the same name within yards of each other competing and chasing the same quid. Hopefully now the lesson has been learnt and they should focus on 1 store maximum in any town centre.
• The pricing policy needs looking at immediately. One of the big criticisms of GAME stores was the huge variance in some of the pricing, especially with the second hand stock. Having preowned games on sale for more than brand new copies smacks of laziness. They also need to look hard at the quantities of preowned games they take in, rather than simply take games for the sake of it
• Perhaps the biggest suggestion of all is this : learn from your mistakes. Not everyone is given a second chance like this. Screw it up this time and it really will be GAME over.
• Assess the competition. The pricing strategies of HMV should be lesson enough to ensure that you don’t follow their path. CEX specialise in mainly second hand stuff. The supermarkets will always have the power to offer better deals but most gamers would rather go to a game specialist. Set out your own stall and be unique, but not unique enough to alienate customers.
• Finally there will be many who would have happily seen GAME go to the wall. The suppliers pulling out before administration was viewed in some quarters as “turnabout being fair play” Mend those bridges and be less like the old GAME.

What do I know ? Well not much but I do know we still have a specialist game retailer on the high street who Mum and Dad and Nan can go to on birthdays and Christmas and get the Call of Duty game you wanted rather than the Call of Juarez game you had never heard of.

Its happened to us all which is why we need specialist stores around to prevent it from happening

Embrace change and take the second chance. From the ashes a phoenix can rise but it is entirely within your own destiny. Screw it up this time and no tears will be shed.

NOTE : Since I wrote this article back on 2^nd April, it has been well documented on various forums that GAME have not learnt a thing. Game prices for pre-owned items are back up to ludicrous levels, so much so that you can buy brand new copies at other stores for anything up to £10 less than GAME are selling second hand.

People are now trading back to GAME all the titles they got in the “spring clean / fire sale” a few weeks ago. Gamers are boasting how they have been able to make £30+ in some cases by trading back to GAME what they previously tried to get rid of.

Finally, probably the worst example has been items being put on the shelves with damaged boxes or missing instructions – what would be classed as seconds – and put on sale for quick removal. One store was reported selling these games at higher prices than the pre-owned stock they already had.

Perhaps, after all this, they do deserve to go to the wall after all…………..

Oh no, not again......

With the fragile future of GAME hanging in the balance, it seemed only appropriate to say a few words in passing whilst with each day that goes by we wonder if the retail giant is heading towards it’s own Game Over….

This week could spell the end for GAME and Gamestation

Being a gamer it is almost impossible to ignore the continual slide and slow demise of the Game group over the last few months. I have thought long and hard about writing this article, but with news over the weekend that there is likely to be no rescue package and that the company will be left to wither away, I felt it was time to chuck in my two cents and say what I really think about it all.

Sadly the way we now do our shopping has changed so much since the rise of the internet. Online buying and selling has become the norm, which has played a huge part in the demise of Game. All of a sudden, a whole world of competition that was not there back in 1992 is rife in 2012. Consumers simply have more choice, more options and if they so wish they can do all this from the comfort of their armchairs, beds, gardens and even on the move in buses, cars or trains.

Mobile phones and shopping now go hand in hand - it was only a few years ago we were discovering the delights of shopping via computer

There will be some who will not be sad to see Game go. Years of bizarre pricing strategies have seen consumers head elsewhere, something that HMV has also seen. You can now even buy games in your local supermarket and usually at a much cheaper price. Huge amounts of second hand stock held by Game is now being shipped out and sold off really cheaply to raise cash and reduce their liabilities. If this company, which insists on having 2 or 3 shops from the same group mere yards from each other in some places, would only have looked at the costs involved in doing so they may have wondered if they had actually been doing themselves any favours over the years.

It was only 25 years ago your local newsagent would be stocking C64 and Spectrum games, meaning you wouldn’t have far to go to get your gaming fixes. Big names like WHSmith, Woolworths and Boots would be your usual port of call for big supplies of games, and the odd local independent retailer would also be battling for your cash. Up near me I can think of three local independents I used to go to, with one of those still going strongly today. Nowadays your local newsagent is likely to be a Tesco Express. WHSmith and Boots no longer stock games and Woolworths no longer exists.

The innocence of the corner shop from days gone by are no more and we shall never see it's like again - 25 years ago shops like this would be a good source of computer games

Game have not helped themselves by trying to deflect the blame anywhere but at it’s own doorstep. Yes we know competition is beyond fierce and that online trading is the way things are going but, by their reasoning, with no new consoles coming out, consumers don’t want the products on the market. That simply isn’t true. Yes the 360 and Wii are showing their age but we have seen the 3DS, PS Vita, Kinect and Playstation Move all come to market in the last 18 months. There is new tech out there, it is not the consumer’s fault that some of it simply isn’t appealing. Times are tough and we cannot all afford to shell out up to £200 unless it is justified. Consumers are being far shrewder with their cash at the moment, and a high end expensive market like the video games market is always going to suffer, despite a successful second hand sector.

It is extremely unlikely that Game, the company which purchased Electronics Boutique and Gamestation turning their closest rivals into their own brand, will be saved. This will therefore leave us with three basic scenarios : administration bringing a new buyer and owner to take over, the opportunity for a new retailer to rise from the ashes or simply that buying games will become an online and supermarket phenomenon. The last option worries me greatly but at this moment in time seems the most likely outcome.

As birthdays come and go, every now and then one of them is a milestone. Be it 16, 18, 21, the dreaded 40 and the even more dreaded 65 – only one stands above them all. That is the Big One and RetroBear joins in the centenary celebrations of Retro Gamer Magazine…..

Happy 100 Retro Gamer !

Usually I shun birthdays as I have no wish to be reminded just how old I am getting and how young I actually used to be. However there is one birthday I shall be raising a crafty glass to this week and that is the milestone reached by Retro Gamer magazine – it’s sparkling, glittering 100^th issue. 8 long years in the making and the publication is still going from strength to strength, packing loads of pages with lots of articles about the games from the past.

When it started in 2004 there would have been much trepidation as to how successful a magazine could be, especially with the subject matter being in the past. There must have been a demand for it, but given how collectable retro gaming has become in the last 2-3 years there can be no doubt that as us gamers who remember all the old games get older we wish to be reminded of just how much fun computer games were back in the day.

The very first issue of Retro Gamer - which is being reprinted and available as a free gift with Issue 100

So how can a modern publication, now published monthly as opposed to quarterly and surviving the collapse of their original publisher in 2005, find articles to fill their pages with. Well it’s quite simple really. There is a news section, a calendar featuring key dates in gaming history, a look back at 2 months in retro history, game reviews, players guides, arcade reviews for those gamers who restore old cabinets. There are also future classics featuring games which will be retro in the future, the compulsory letters page, interviews with programmers, games designers and retro gaming figureheads and reviews of new games, as well as retro reissues.

If you throw all that together, as well as a series of articles looking in depth at how retro consoles came about, you get an idea of the wealth of information that is out there. Many of those previously in the computer and video game industry have stepped forward to be interviewed and talk about their experiences back in the day. The sheer passion they still have comes out in interviews and articles. They must be surprised as anyone at just how their comments and insights are lapped up by gamers, both old and new.

I have been a subscriber for nearly 3 years after picking up my first issue back in the summer of 2008. While I haven’t necessarily been interested in all of the articles and can certainly claim to have gone back and read some of the ones I skipped just because I wanted something to read, a huge proportion of the magazine is of great interest to me and a fabulous read. In the day and age of blogs and websites such as these, one must bow down and accept that Retro Gamer magazine is the bible for gamers from all works of life.

Issue 53 - ah yes the delights of Track and Field, or as it is more commonly know, Sore Wrists and Broken Joysticks

For someone brought up on the likes of Zzap64, C&VG and Amiga Format, Retro Gamer has been the first publication for a very long time I have wanted to read again and again and again.

Gentlemen, RetroSection proudly salutes you and toasts you to 100 more fabulous issues.

Here;s to another 100 !

To close the February Free For All – which in all honesty has been a bit of a disaster content wise but Bear with me because the Mega Drive is up next and I absolutely love that machine – I thought it best to close out with another patented RetroSection list. They are easy to do and don’t require too much taxing of the old brain cells. I can feel the writer’s block gradually lifting and personally cannot wait to get my teeth into the mass of Mega Drive games that await me.

This game is like the February Free For All - a bit of a disaster.....

So join me as we bid farewell to February and welcome the much warmer, brighter and altogether more appreciated March with some more retro musings…..

WHY CAN’T I GET ON WITH……

STREET FIGHTER II – Hailed as one of the best beat em up games ever, and hailed by me as a button mashing nightmare of a game. I for one cannot and will not see the appeal of this side-on fighting game. I resent having to know all the button combinations beyond kick and punch. Too may of my formative years were spent being pulverised by people who knew what they were doing. Nothing was guaranteed to piss me off more than another night playing Street Fighter II on the SNES. Just for the record I tried to play it the other night…..and still couldn’t do any more than punch or kick.

SUPER MARIO KART – It might seem like this is turning into a hatred for all things Nintendo but I can assure you it isn’t. No matter what version of Mario Kart it is, I simply cannot think of anything worse – well maybe a night in playing Street Fighter II. If it wasn’t for the total unfairness of it all, I might like it. My friends have always agreed that there is a certain unpredictability about it and friendships have been strained because of it. I will admit a liking for Double Dash on the Gamecube, however, but that version along with Mario Kart 64 are regarded by many as inferior to the original Super Mario Kart – therefore meaning that I only like crappy versions of Mario Kart, which in my opinion is most of them.

WHY DOES THIS NOT EXCITE ME LIKE IT SHOULD…..

THE PLAYSTATION VITA – Seriously I am about as unexcited about this as I am excited to be getting a new motorised polisher for my car. The 3DS died on its arse when it was launched and only now, because of Mario releases, is it beginning to get noticed. Time will tell on the Vita but for me it’s not something I care two jots about.

N64 AND PS1 GAMES – Some of these games look absolutely  horrible now compared to when we first came across them back in the day. Two examples spring to mind – Turok on the N64 and Spiderman on the PS1 (Probably because I have played these two fairly recently). When Turok first came out it was well received but playing it now sees you running round in a foggy atmosphere with not much going on. Ditto for Spiderman which is ruined by some god awful polygonyish graphics at the start of the game. I know it’s meant to be a comic book but some of this is barely playable. Why have games like these aged so badly? Are they now more unplayable than less technically advanced games i.e. Frogger? Pop a PS1 game in your PS3 and you’ll soon find out.

IT’S TIME TO RUMBLE – SOME REASONS WHY SOME THINGS ARE BETTER THAN OTHERS (AND OTHER FANBOY ARGUMENTS)

WHO WOULD WIN A FIGHT BETWEEN :

C64 V SPECTRUM V AMSTRAD

The C64 had the most awesome music chip of all time
The Amstrad came with a green screen monitor
The Spectrum was responsible for a whole generation of gamers and coders

RESULT : I like music so the C64 just takes it from the Speccy

MEGA DRIVE V SUPER NINTENDO

The Mega Drive came in black whilst the SNES was sort of beigy cream
Sonic AND Mario – two killer games and practically inseparable
The SNES had Mode 7 tucked away to give some fairly impressive 3D stuff
The Mega Drive was the console which revolutionised home gaming and had at least a 12 month head start on the SNES

RESULT : Close to call but I’d have Sega’s black beast winning by a nose

AMIGA V ATARI ST

The Amiga, while occasionally suffering from lazy porting of games from the ST, was superior in graphics, sound and capabilities
The ST was crap

RESULT : Duh…...

GAMEBOY V GAME GEAR V LYNX

Although the Game Boy was monochrome it actually made the portable gaming market its own – and came packaged with Tetris
The Game Gear ate batteries and was the size of a small house
The Lynx did exactly the same as the Game Gear, and didn’t even have a TV Tuner

RESULT : Are you mad ? Game Boy by a distance

PS1 V SEGA SATURN V N64

Sony showed that you could make games using CD’s that were pretty good
The Saturn suffered because it was too late to market, causing irreparable damage to Sega
The N64 was hampered by being cartridge only which came in those silly cardboard boxes. Some games needed you to invest in an expansion pack because the cartridge was bigger in memory terms than a stock N64 could handle

RESULT : No looking beyond the PS1 on this one. The N64 comes a close second though.

DREAMCAST V PS2 V XBOX V GAMECUBE

The Gamecube and the Dreamcast could not play DVD’s
The XBOX was made by Microsoft, which in turn wasn’t all that bad a thing as people made out at the time
The PS2 was first to market, took hold of it and never let go – they were still making games for it in 2011 – and it outlasted all it’s rivals
The Gamecube never took off after a lacklustre launch
The Dreamcast never took off because Sega were last to market and despite making a damn fine machine, had no takers
The XBOX was made by Microsoft which turned out not to be as good a thing as people made out at the time

RESULT : PS2 takes it with the rest fighting amongst themselves for second place.

The following reasons are why Mario is better than Sonic, and why Sonic is better than Mario – at least, for arguments sake, that will give you something to mull over until next time :

It's the battle to end all battles, the rage in the cage, the rumble in the jungle - but who comes out on top ?

MARIO IS BETTER THAN SONIC because : He collects coins, thus ensuring a wealthy journey through his adventures. Sonic collects rings, which unless they are made of a particularly valuable metal, mean that they are worthless.

SONIC IS BETTER THAN MARIO because : He gets there quicker. Seriously if you were hanging around waiting for Mario to show up then you would be waiting a very long time. I am surprised the Princess never died of old age. There is an art to arriving early and with Sonic’s speed he will always be there on time.

SONIC IS BETTER THAN MARIO because : He wears the coolest looking training shoes. Mario wears dungarees which weren’t even fashionable in 1985 when Super Mario Bros arrived on the NES. Mario also has one of those dodgy 1970’s porn film moustaches which, being a plumber, means he may have a second career on the side we don’t know about

MARIO IS BETTER THAN SONIC because : When he opens his mouth he sounds like he looks i.e. A stereotypical Italian. When Sonic opens his trap he sounds like a 7 year old boy, and has done so for many years. It might be a nice idea to have Sonic’s vocal chords be a little more masculine in future

MARIO IS BETTER THAN SONIC because : The spin off games involving Mario and his supporting cast – Mario Golf, Mario Tennis, Mario Kart and Mario Party – are considerably better than Sonic’s – Sonic Spinball, Sega Superstar Tennis, Sega All Star Racing and Sonic Shuffle.

SONIC IS BETTER THAN MARIO because : His animated TV series didn’t have a couple of second rate actors pretending to be Mario and Luigi in some poorly scripted inserts before the low quality animation kicked in.

MARIO IS BETTER THAN SONIC because : Mario games make Nintendo consoles. Super Mario Bros was given away with the NES, whilst the third game in that series is one of the greatest games of all time. Super Mario World, again, was bundled with a special version of the SNES. Mario 64 launched the N64. Super Mario Galaxy is going to be a future classic on the Wii and the new Super Mario World 3D is going to shift a lot of handhelds. Sonic no longer has a console to call his own and despite games like Sonic R on the Saturn and Sonic Adventure on the Dreamcast being rather good, both those systems died a death.

SONIC IS BETTER THAN MARIO because : He is just so much cooler than Mario. He’s the sort of character who you want to hang out with. Mario isn’t all that appealing and to be honest when all your best friends come from some fantasy world you have to keep visiting then you can’t be all that popular in the first place.

The battles shall of course rage on and the arguments shall continue, but one thing is assured : Mario & Sonic are probably the two most identifiable characters in video game history and shall forever be associated with it. In some ways that’s a pretty damn good thing…….

Not quite a box of chocolates, but you still don't know what you are going to get

February is a funny old month – long enough away from Christmas for it to be a fond, fuzzy memory whilst bringing you one step closer to summer. Either way, no matter what the time of year it’s always a time for games. The February Free-For-All means just that ; no set format, no set genre, no limit on games. It’s simply going to be a case of plug in, pick up and play. The whole random nature of this should be rather fun, and it’s going to an entry-a-day too, so plenty to look forward to.

Handhelds at the ready, it’s the Nintendo GameBoy Advance with two games bordering along the lines of the terrific and the turd-like…..

F-ZERO GP LEGEND (2003, GAMEBOY ADVANCE)

Classic futuristic racing series meets anime storytelling - but is it everyone's cup of tea ?

F-Zero had previously thrilled Super Nintendo owners with it’s breakneck speed races in a futuristic environment. It was therefore no surprise when this popped up on the GameBoy Advance, albeit with a a slight twist on the original game. Rather than go for a straight racing game, which you can actually opt for, the makers of the game have added a story mode. This means you can choose from different characters and take them through the racing season whilst taking part in a storyline.

You don't have to play in story mode and can simply jump in and race - which is what I prefer to do

Even with the GBA’s limitations, this moves at one heck of a speed. Graphically it’s pretty impressive with the visuals looking the part. There is also a rather cool soundtrack that bops along in the background alongside the usual and sparse sound effects. It’s a pretty good game, though there are one or two issues. If I play a racing game – that is what I want, and thus the story mode doesn’t really add anything for me. The map in the left hand corner is useful to the point of following where you are going, but you have no idea where the other cars are on the track. The fact you are up against 30 other racers and you hardly see anyone else on the track is a bit mind boggling.

It all boils down to the quality of the racing, and F-Zero GP Legend delivers

Those niggles aside this is a damn good racer and a worthy addition to the series. Whilst not as good as the original, or the GameCube F-Zero GX, GP Legend will appeal and suit all fans of fast and furious racing games.

POP IDOL (2003, GAMEBOY ADVANCE)

Play this game first and if you ever get to meet Simon Cowell then by all means lay into him over how horrible this game actually is

Before X-Factor took over the world we had Pop Idol. I’m no fan of either of these “talent” shows, although there is something sadistically appealing about Simon Cowell being incredibly rude to someone who obviously cannot hold a tune in a bucket. Not wanting to miss a trick, a computer game version of Pop Idol was inevitable – this is it. It follows the format of the show, with preliminary rounds, the final cut and the live shows before the final.

At least some thought has gone into transferring a rhythmn game to a handheld

Making up for the lack of a Singstar-style game, you control your chosen contestants vocals by pressing the A or B button when prompted, turning this into a rhythm game instead. Miss a vocal and your singer will begin to sing off key until you get back in time. At the end of each song the panel will give their verdict and it’s either on the way to the next round or to the nearest bus stop. As you progress, round by round the game quickens up and your reactions need to be quicker. You can also change your costume and hairstyle, if only to satisfy your own vanity.

One would imagine this game would be a lot more fun if there was more to it than that, but there isn’t. It’s sort of Dragon’s Lair for the couch potato generation – press the button at the right time. There is no depth to the game whatsoever. The graphics range from OK to blocky, with your contestant resembling something from Legoland at times. However the biggest aspect for the failure of this game is not just the shallowness of the playability, but the poor quality of the sound. You’d have thought the music would have been a bit special but instead you either get a male or female vocal , depending on your choice of contestant, singing over a backing track of tunes such as Oops I Did It Again, Spinning Around, Living La Vida Loca and rather bizarrely, given that line-up, Suspicious Minds. All of the music, vocals and sampled speech in this game sounds scratchy and distorted as hell. Sure, it is funny when the singer goes out of tune but that smile gets wiped off your face pretty damn quickly.

This is about as exciting as it gets, which isn't saying much

Summing up, I got to the final on my first go. I didn’t win but I was so bored by that point I didn’t care. Did my choice of Suspicious Minds put the judges off, or was it the red strappy top and mini skirt I chose to wear ? I’m not sure I want to know…….or ever play this pile of poop again.

As the cold weather begins to creep in, what better way to warm your hands than on a veritable raging fire of hot NES games. This is the final part of the NES January Classic 2012 and there are still one or two surprises for Retrobear to unearth…..

Even if your old consoles don't work you can always adapt them into something more useful instead

And now the end is near, and we reach, the final few-games-of-the-NES-January-classic. The observant amongst you will notice that once again I have failed to go for the more obvious titles – those being anything with Mario and Zelda in the title, Metroid, Castlevania etc. That is purely because rather than play games that people have played over and over again and been reviewed to shit by literally everyone running their own site and blog, I just want to be a little different.

That’s not to say I won’t play and review them in the future though………….maybe.

SNOOPY’S SILLY SPORTS SPECTACULAR – I love the Peanuts cartoon and think Snoopy is one of the best cartoon characters ever drawn, but this game really is an absolute waste of a licence. There are only 6 sports to choose from – though the events are suitably bonkers such as boot throwing, sack racing and a fight on a canoe – and you only get to compete against Snoopy’s brother Spike. There is no real long term appeal and while the graphics are nicely drawn, there is none of the humour of the cartoon here. The game was remade with Donald Duck for the Japanese market but I doubt that would have made much difference. A very limited game with very limited appeal, and that’s from a Snoopy fan.

THUNDERBIRDS – Another great show I remember from my early days sat in front of the TV on Sunday lunchtimes. Tuned in to the old ATV channel, waiting for University Challenge to finish before Thunderbirds started and then Benson came on. Ah the memories…….anyway enough recollecting. This is a rather disappointing take on the legendary TV series where, rather than turn it into yet another platform tie in, Thunderbirds is turned into a vertical scrolling shoot em up. I’m sorry but I don’t remember too much aerial combat from the TV series. It’s like 1942, 1943, Flying Shark, Xevious etc etc, just with all the regular Thunderbird vehicles in place. It looks the part, sounds OK and the introduction is great, but the game is just lumbered with dull gameplay. It’s also quite hard which, coupled with the boredom setting in, makes for a rather unsatisfactory experience. Thunderbirds are most definitely not Go.

UNTOUCHABLES, THE – I have briefly touched on this game before but it is safe to say it’s one of the more impressive move tie-ins of it’s day. Based on the 1987 film of the same name – and released 4 years later on the NES – you play Elliot Ness doing his best to shut down Al Capone’s various rackets before bringing the man himself to justice. Along the way you take part in 3D street shooting sections – ducking behind a wall and popping out to shoot bad guys in the alleyway windows – and Operation Wolf side scrolling games, gunning down gangsters as you go. It’s a fun, if samey, package that complements the film well. Definitely one to check out.

VOLLEYBALL – Ah yes volleyball. The game with very little following outside of Brazil, China and Cuba – unless we are talking about Beach Volleyball in which case everyone is an expert when it comes to bikini clad women knocking a ball over a net (or tight shorted men for all you female retro gaming fans out there). There aren’t all that many volleyball games out there and this one from 1987 may be one of the best. It does have control issues. You can never tell which players you are controlling due to the random selection method chosen by the computer. It’s all a bit dated looking too and to be honest unless you are a volleyball nut, it’s not going to appeal to you. If you are looking for something different it might be worth a look but you won’t get too much playing time out of this one.

WOLVERINE – Possibly the coolest Super Hero of them all is given the duff treatment in yet another crappy tie in game. Yep it’s our old friend the bog standard platform game, involving inch perfect jumps, enemies shooting from you from off screen, obscure pick ups (for increased health collect hamburgers !) and a total waste of a main character. I personally could not find anything redeeming about this game at all. Yes it does feature other X-Men related characters – boss battles against Magneto and Sabretooth and assistance from Psylocke and Havoc amongst others – but the chances are you’ll be so fed up with this waste of space that you simply won’t care. I know I didn’t and I love comic books.

XEVIOUS – Looking amazingly dated now, Xevious is still a pretty good blast today and was even updated a while back and given the New Gen makeover. It’s not surprising that it looks dated, as the original goes back to 1982 and this release was from 1988. To say it is one of the most famous arcade games in history is doing it an immense injustice. It’s still a very credible blaster today, allowing you to target oncoming enemies with one fire button and bombing ground enemies with the other. If you are clever enough, because of the ship’s ability to move up and down the screen, you might be able to progress through the levels without shooting at anything and just avoiding enemies. Xevious is one of those games that must be played to appreciate how far gaming has come and where it’s roots come from. There are better examples around, but none with the rich history that Xevious has.

YOUNG INDIANA JONES CHRONICLES, THE – Based on the short lived TV series from George Lucas, thanks for that George, this is yet another depressingly awful platform game which borders on the lines of dreadful. Young Indiana looks like a cross between Bret Hart and Michael Jackson. The weapons you pick up – including Indy’s trademark hat, yes a hat is a power up of sorts – are taken away when you get hit by enemies. The bullets from the guns tend to blend into the background. Disposing of enemies on horseback means you get charged by the horse which can’t be killed and, finally, beware of cactuses that look like background objects but aren’t – even though they are placed next to wheels which are background objects. The game might get better as it goes along but frankly I couldn’t care less. Playing this for less than 30 minutes was enough for me and there is no desire to go any further with it. Thanks again George.

ZANAC – Another ancient shoot em up, though this is one that was exclusively for the home market rather than arcades. There are a couple of really impressive things about Zanac. The fact you can shoot your weapons at all angles and not just straight ahead. The waves of enemy attackers are vast, with no visible slowdown on-screen so the whole thing moves at a fair lick. It is simple enough to encourage progression whilst remaining a challenge. Sadly the last two things are what goes against Zanac. The difficulty curve will be too steep for some and the sheer speed and volume of enemies is just overwhelming. Quick reflexes and patience are most definitely required, but Zanac is still a quality shooter for fans of the genre.

A quick look ahead to some of the fun things that are planned here for Retrosection in the next 12 months. Of course there will be other bits and pieces but the idea is to have a nice them for each month. Read on for more details….

12 months is a long time in video gaming...........

Each month this year I am going to have a theme each month. It will be devoted to a different console/computer and it’s games. These will as always take a random form of selection but will also allow me to include all my favourites and a few obscure ones as well :

NES JANUARY CLASSIC : Focussing on Nintendo’s grey box of magic, which whilst not my favourite machine of all time, was more or less responsible for kick-starting the video game craze again after the traumas of 1983

FEBRUARY FREE FOR ALL : Completely random games across the board and from all sorts of places and areas. This will be a lot of fun as I shall be going into unknown waters. Where possible I shall try and avoid any of the other machines making up the 11 other months of the year

MEGADRIVE MARCH MADNESS : One of my favourite consoles, the Mega Drive was one of the machines I was lucky enough to own first time around. Plenty of arcade and original classics and I shall really enjoy giving them a whirl

AMIGA APRIL APOCALYPSE : The first proper computer I ever owned and the machine all my mates had when we went to big school. It will at least give me the chance to dig Kick Off 2 out again – and maybe Sensible Soccer though that is a BIG maybe…..

MASTER SYSTEM MAY MAYHEM : I prefer the Master System over the NES for reasons I cannot actually explain. It will be interesting to see by the end of this if that is very much still the case

N64 JUNE JAMBOREE : My second favourite console of all time. From the moment I first played Goldeneye I was in love with the machine and for me it is the best console Nintendo have ever produced

DREAMCAST JULY JUBILEE : A very underrated console which suffered from release delays and a market which by that point had lost it’s trust in Sega following the launch disaster that was the Saturn. This though for me is probably my favourite Sega console of all

PS1 AUGUST ARMAGEDDON : Some of the games have aged terribly but you cannot deny that the PS1 was something of a phenomenon when it launched. It gave us a new player in the games market and a little grey wonder with some fabulous games

XBOX SEPTEMBER SMASH-UP : Like the Dreamcast, I have always felt the XBOX was underrated and under-appreciated. Yes it weighed a tonne and cost a bomb but it had massive potential. Give me this over the 360 any day

GAMECUBE OCTOBER O.M.G. : You can argue all you want but I class the Cube, XBOX and PS2 as retro simply because I do. The Cube suffered from a lack of decent launch titles and no DVD facility so gamers stayed away and picked up PS2s and XBOXs instead. Its a shame because as we shall find out there were some awesome titles for it

SUPER NINTENDO SUPER NOVEMBER : I had a lot of exposure to the SNES growing up so it does have a fond place in my heart. Most of those involved being pummelled on Street Fighter II but not all the memories were as bad as that

PS2 DECEMBER DEMOLITION : To finish with, arguably the greatest console of them all ? Well we shall see but with a massive back catalogue which is still being added to a trip through some PS2 awesomeness is most definitely called for.

Is it too much to ask for something a little different ? After all if everything is the same over and over again it all becomes a bit safe and predictable. After casting an eye over some of 2012’s big game releases, RetroBear sharpens his claws once again for another attack on modern gaming….

Now wouldn't that be something ?

I did something rather naughty over Christmas and as such I am here to repent my sins. Yes, for one of the very few times in recent memory, I purchased games that were not of the retro variety. Shock ! Horror ! Gasp ! I should be paraded through the local village and pelted with fruit for committing such a crime. However there was indeed method to my madness. Firstly one was a game I had developed a rather unhealthy fetish for and the other seemed to be very appealing and as such seemed worth a go at the price it was offered at.

About as un-Disney a game as you can get

The first game was Epic Mickey for the Wii. The old white wonder has gradually been turning grey due to all the dust it has been gathering since we were kindly gifted it 2 years ago, and I felt it deserved a new game (not that I play any of the ones I already have for it). Ever since I saw the trailer last year for Epic Mickey I was intrigued by the dark approach to a Disney game, and as the price had plummeted it was worth the gamble. All I need now are some batteries for the controllers……

The second game was L A Noire on the PS3, which is essentially Grand Theft Auto but with more trilby hats. This detective romp had caught my eye when it came out and was recommended to me as an essential purchase. I stood 40 minutes in the queue to buy the game 2^nd hand, and then found out it had all the DLC with it as well. Unfortunately an ear infection and limited hearing has meant I have spent more time saying “Eh” and a lot and less time beating confessions out of dodgy looking 1940’s gangsters.

Can't wait to slap on a trilby and get interrogating

The big question I have been asking myself over Christmas though is where is the originality in the games market at the moment ? Casting an eye over the new releases due this year, the answer is a pretty resounding “Not to be seen”. It was whilst playing Sonic Generations that I found myself wondering if this constant regurgitation and repetition is coming to an end. Sonic Generations is a fine game, but it is essentially bog standard Sonic with a twist. Having said that, at least Sega have tried (and failed miserably) in recent years to move Sonic away from ring collecting.

So looking ahead to 2012 here are some of the things that you can look forward to :

RESIDENT EVIL : REVELATIONS – Resident Evil in 3D ? That might be new if we hadn’t had all those first person games from the PS1 onwards. Resident Evil on a handheld however ? Hmmm no it’s been done before on the Game Boy Color, so I am afraid not many marks for originality there.

FINAL FANTASY XIII-2 – Oh joy another FF game to add to the multitudes I have already not played. This is a direct sequel to FFXIII which makes you wonder why it’s not called FFXIV. Now if they made a FF curling simulator that might be a bit different. After all it would be a sort of turn-based-combat…..

SOUL CALIBUR V – Now featuring the dude from Assassin’s Creed, which means no place for Darth Vader or Yoda this time around. It also doesn’t sound a whole lot different either.

THE DARKNESS II – I thought they had split up ? Anyway, no marks for originality as it is a sequel with the added bonus of a 4 player co-op option. So maybe a little different, but not much.

SSX – The snowboarding series gets the next gen makeover. Will it be any good ? I quite enjoyed the old SSX games so it will be interesting to see how this turns out, but where all else fails dust off an old classic, tart it up and watch the wonga roll in i.e. not very original.

Now those are just 5 games I have picked from a list I found on Digital Spy, but aside from SSX they all appear to be sequels. Now unless these are packed with radical new improvements, they are likely to be the same thing aren’t they ? Soul Calibur is going to rely on you kicking the shit out of your opponent unless they have included a supermarket trolley dash as a hidden level. Resident Evil is going to be about gunning down zombies as opposed to forming a close harmony choir and getting a date booked at the Proms.

I haven’t even mentioned the planned update of Amiga classic Syndicate, another installment of Mass Effect, a further volume in the Grand Theft Auto and Mario finally kicking the 3DS into shape with his first 3D true adventure and Mario Kart 7. Yes there is no denying there is public appetite for these games and they will all sell well (Mario is breaking all kinds of records if reports are to be believed). It just makes me sad that the best the industry can do right now is make easy money with sequels.

That'll wipe the silly grin of that plumber's face

It makes me long for the days of original games like Head Over Heels, Saboteur and Wizball, games that were totally different from anything you had seen or played before. Is it because all the good ideas have been done ? Is it because no one wants to take the risk with a bold new title ? I guess the only way we will see any changes is if any of these, and the other major titles, tank on release. If they don’t, expect Mario Kart 35 sometime in the near future.

Never has a truer word been spoken - although I would have had the violence as the biggest share from experience