The weather in March was lovely. Now we have entered April the weather has turned for the worse. Hail, thunder and torrential rain coupled with colder than average temperatures can mean only one thing. Yes, it’s Car Boot season once again. Ah yes you can almost smell the hotdogs and burgers from the comfort of your own room. Never has there been more fun from being crammed into a tiny field at 7am on a Sunday morning than by going to a booty.

A perfect site for sore retro eyes - there be bargains to be had out there !

So here are a few tips to keep you on your guard during the next few months :

1. Always take a small bag or rucksack with you. I made this mistake many times believing that it was either too late in the season to get any bargains or there won’t be any booters around because it was holiday season. Never underestimate what might be there.
2. Park as close as you can to the car boot as is possible. Nothing hurts more than carrying round a boxed Nintendo Gamecube Donkey Konga set, as I experienced 3 years ago. You can’t always park close but if you do make a large purchase like that don’t man up and think that because you only have a few rows to go it won’t hurt. It does.
3. Get there early. I know some of these things start at stupid o’clock but even arriving an hour after the boot starts means you are likely to have missed something. These places are full of traders and specialists who will be there when Dawn cracks. If you want the best stuff, get there early.
4. Get in early. Almost the same as above. Don’t leave something to chance as in “I’ll come back later”. If it is something you want, buy it there and then. It won’t be there later.
5. Use your own judgement. If you think you are paying too much for something then say so. It’s always best to barter, after all that is what car booting is all about. In most cases the seller will have added a couple of quid to the asking price so if you knock them down they are still getting a good deal. I should take my own advice sometimes – I tend to consider the price and think if it’s fair I’ll pay it. If it’s too much I’ll walk away rather than haggle.
6. Watch out for traders. You’ll know who they are. These are the ones who have priced high and won’t move on it because then you will be eating into their profit margin. Occasionally you can get a good deal if you buy a few things but on most occasions if it is priced highly it is priced to sell and not to be knocked down.
7. Check the condition. This is particularly with disc based games. No one is going to shout at you if you want to look at the state of a disc. If they do, then they have something to hide. Always check the contents of the box too because you might not be getting what you think you are buying, but then again I have had the odd bonus find with an extra disc inside.
8. Be sensible. Nothing pisses people off more at a car boot than someone being aggressive when it comes to haggling on prices. It’ll get you short shrift and leaves a nasty taste in everyone’s mouth. Bite your tongue if someone is being a wanker and move on, don’t get involved and start anything. It will only end in tears. Some of these places are very well marshalled and some I have been to have police officers close at hand.

There are also a couple of tips if you fancy parting with any of your collection :

1. Be realistic with your pricing. Not everyone goes to a booty with £100 in their pocket so just consider this if you think marking up your dusty PS2 with a few FIFA and WWE games at £25 is going to attract many buyers. It won’t and you’ll end up taking it back home. If you want to make that sort of profit then shove it on eBay. Go to a booty, price sensibly so you make a few quid and enjoy it.
2. Beware the trader. We’ve touched on these guys before and they will become very persistent in wanting your stuff before it goes on sale. As soon as you arrive they’ll be hovering round your car, peeking inside and asking questions. You can either do two things – give in or sit inside and wait until they have gone. They’ll want your stuff and will pay only a fraction what you want for it, and you will guarantee walking around afterwards they’ll be selling it on their stall – at a much higher price than you sold it to them. Hold your ground and be strong.
3. Be kind. If someone is trying to rip you off – and this applies to selling as well – just a few kind words and send them on their way. The last thing you want to do is get into a scrap at a booty. If they try and knock down your prices, go with it and drop if you can. If you can’t, say so and be honest. If they get all aggressive about it, just be polite. Don’t let people bully you either – after all unless you are trading or selling for charity you have your own limits set and if they don’t agree with them that is their problem.
4. Do your research. It’s always best to try a few boot fairs as a buyer and see how busy they are. Do some internet searches as well and see if you can find popular sites. The last thing you should do is join a gaming forum and ask people where good ones are. Chances are most retro gamers won’t reveal where they go for fear of an influx of buyers. There is, most definitely, a difference between standing in a field and making a decent wad and standing in a field and making 12 sales all day, believe me I had the latter happen because I didn’t do my research. A good source of information is the local free paper as there always a few adverts about upcoming and long running events

So there you go. This is not a definitive list by any standards, nor should it be taken as gospel. This is simply me passing on my experiences to you. The best advice of all, buying or selling, is to simply go and have a good day and pick up some great bargains or make a few quid.

Now get out there and grab a bargain before they are all gone.....or I get there first

As we say goodbye to the Mega Drive, in closing it is worth saying that this is one of my most favourite machines ever. It looked cool, it played your arcade favourites and brought some arcade quality into the home, producing new gems such as Streets of Rage and Sonic that are iconic masterpieces of video games programming.

We've played some classics and we've had some fun but for Sega Mega Drive March Madness we must move on

Of course there are the downsides too. Each game cost around £40.00, it suffered from some lazy conversions compared to the SNES, the Mega Drive II wasn’t as cool as the original console and at the end of the day it was being flogged to death for every last drop of technological advancement it had (the Mega CD and 32X)

One final thought – when the Mega Drive first launched in Japan it was possible to import Mega Drives into the UK Legally. These were known as “grey imports” which led to much confusion. We all thought the Mega Drive was black and wondered if we did get one, it would be a dodgy grey coloured version. Oh how we had much to learn……..and we all waited for the original UK release. Well my mates did, I had to wait until 1994 to buy a second hand version from a chap at college.

Anyway I digress – here are the final few Mega Drive March Madness games………..

SUPER KICK OFF – It’s probably worth remembering that 50% of the games with the word SUPER stuck in front of them were rubbish and the other 50% were great. So how do you go about making the world’s best football game even better ? Well not by sticking the word SUPER in front of it because never have I had a more disappointing gaming experience than when I played this. I couldn’t believe that Kick Off could have two such differing versions. The controls are abysmally awful with the ball constantly running away from you. Everything moves too slowly and the graphics are inferior to the Amiga version. The main thing it lacks is playability and that is what made Kick Off great. I hate to say it but Sensible Soccer happily thrashes Super Kick Off when you put them up against each other.

SUPERMAN : THE MAN OF STEEL – Usually I can find words to summarise a game, good or bad. It might end up with the same old phrases being trotted out, but it comes from the heart. So how do I honestly critique a game which is as average as Clark Kent, about as interesting as watching paint dry and guaranteed to make your enthusiasm for the Man Of Steel wane faster than the excitement of the ability to leap tall buildings with a single leap ? I’m afraid I just did. Move along please, there is nothing to see here……..

THUNDERFORCE 3 – Far too freakin’ hard for the likes of me. It looks fabulous but suffers from graphical slowdown when too much is going on. No matter how many times I had a go at it I couldn’t get any further and threw down my joypad, tears running down my face. I can’t handle games of this intensity, so it’s one for die hard fans of the shoot em up genre and back to silly effeminate looking platform games for me…..If that wasn’t depressing enough, this is regarded as being the easiest in the series !!!

TURRICAN – Anyone who has played this game would have instantly been struck by how fluid it played, how good it looked and the pretty cool soundtrack. The weapons were ace with the rotating fire being the best choice. The way Turrican looked and moved was pretty amazing. The whole intergalactic look was a big hit with gamers and underneath was a very playable game with some real depth to it. The one problem Turrican had on the Mega Drive was that it was simply a straight port of the Amiga version, some near 2 years before. As such, games had moved on quite a lot since then and, compared to the look of Mega Turrican a few years later, the two could be world’s apart. Worth a look though, definitely.

VR TROOPERS – One thing the Mega Drive was full of was sub par Street Fighter type games that simply failed to capture any imagination or originality before being released. This is a fine example of that, a cash-in on the Power Rangers spin off a-like that were plaguing us in the mid 1990’s. So awful is this game that there is absolutely nothing to see here, even if you are a fan of the series. It should be given a wide berth at all costs. This is a sanitised, almost anti Street Fighter/Mortal Kombat game that fails to achieve anything at any level. Avoid.

WOLVERINE : ADAMANTIUM RAGE – I am not all that convinced that as time has gone on there have been that many successful X-Men games. So taking the most popular character and giving him his own game was a rather bold move. Saddling him with adequate graphics and sounds might win favour in some courts, but when you then chuck in appallingly hard levels, impossibly difficult computer AI and some clunky controls, the gaming experience will make wish you had claws coming out of your own hands to poke your own eyes out.

ZOOL – Finally a game which wowed Amiga owners who were desperately seeking an answer to the console dominance of Mario and Sonic. There was nothing as fast or as colourful as Zool and when the game appeared on the Mega Drive nothing had changed. However, console owners were less than impressed by the over sensitive controls, the samey gameplay and the garish graphics. There were many pretenders to Sonic’s throne over the years, and perhaps Zool is the one that should have come closest to taking the crown. The fact it was so far from the mark was one that had many games experts scratching their heads in disbelief.

As birthdays come and go, every now and then one of them is a milestone. Be it 16, 18, 21, the dreaded 40 and the even more dreaded 65 – only one stands above them all. That is the Big One and RetroBear joins in the centenary celebrations of Retro Gamer Magazine…..

Happy 100 Retro Gamer !

Usually I shun birthdays as I have no wish to be reminded just how old I am getting and how young I actually used to be. However there is one birthday I shall be raising a crafty glass to this week and that is the milestone reached by Retro Gamer magazine – it’s sparkling, glittering 100^th issue. 8 long years in the making and the publication is still going from strength to strength, packing loads of pages with lots of articles about the games from the past.

When it started in 2004 there would have been much trepidation as to how successful a magazine could be, especially with the subject matter being in the past. There must have been a demand for it, but given how collectable retro gaming has become in the last 2-3 years there can be no doubt that as us gamers who remember all the old games get older we wish to be reminded of just how much fun computer games were back in the day.

The very first issue of Retro Gamer - which is being reprinted and available as a free gift with Issue 100

So how can a modern publication, now published monthly as opposed to quarterly and surviving the collapse of their original publisher in 2005, find articles to fill their pages with. Well it’s quite simple really. There is a news section, a calendar featuring key dates in gaming history, a look back at 2 months in retro history, game reviews, players guides, arcade reviews for those gamers who restore old cabinets. There are also future classics featuring games which will be retro in the future, the compulsory letters page, interviews with programmers, games designers and retro gaming figureheads and reviews of new games, as well as retro reissues.

If you throw all that together, as well as a series of articles looking in depth at how retro consoles came about, you get an idea of the wealth of information that is out there. Many of those previously in the computer and video game industry have stepped forward to be interviewed and talk about their experiences back in the day. The sheer passion they still have comes out in interviews and articles. They must be surprised as anyone at just how their comments and insights are lapped up by gamers, both old and new.

I have been a subscriber for nearly 3 years after picking up my first issue back in the summer of 2008. While I haven’t necessarily been interested in all of the articles and can certainly claim to have gone back and read some of the ones I skipped just because I wanted something to read, a huge proportion of the magazine is of great interest to me and a fabulous read. In the day and age of blogs and websites such as these, one must bow down and accept that Retro Gamer magazine is the bible for gamers from all works of life.

Issue 53 - ah yes the delights of Track and Field, or as it is more commonly know, Sore Wrists and Broken Joysticks

For someone brought up on the likes of Zzap64, C&VG and Amiga Format, Retro Gamer has been the first publication for a very long time I have wanted to read again and again and again.

Gentlemen, RetroSection proudly salutes you and toasts you to 100 more fabulous issues.

Here;s to another 100 !

To close the February Free For All – which in all honesty has been a bit of a disaster content wise but Bear with me because the Mega Drive is up next and I absolutely love that machine – I thought it best to close out with another patented RetroSection list. They are easy to do and don’t require too much taxing of the old brain cells. I can feel the writer’s block gradually lifting and personally cannot wait to get my teeth into the mass of Mega Drive games that await me.

This game is like the February Free For All - a bit of a disaster.....

So join me as we bid farewell to February and welcome the much warmer, brighter and altogether more appreciated March with some more retro musings…..

WHY CAN’T I GET ON WITH……

STREET FIGHTER II – Hailed as one of the best beat em up games ever, and hailed by me as a button mashing nightmare of a game. I for one cannot and will not see the appeal of this side-on fighting game. I resent having to know all the button combinations beyond kick and punch. Too may of my formative years were spent being pulverised by people who knew what they were doing. Nothing was guaranteed to piss me off more than another night playing Street Fighter II on the SNES. Just for the record I tried to play it the other night…..and still couldn’t do any more than punch or kick.

SUPER MARIO KART – It might seem like this is turning into a hatred for all things Nintendo but I can assure you it isn’t. No matter what version of Mario Kart it is, I simply cannot think of anything worse – well maybe a night in playing Street Fighter II. If it wasn’t for the total unfairness of it all, I might like it. My friends have always agreed that there is a certain unpredictability about it and friendships have been strained because of it. I will admit a liking for Double Dash on the Gamecube, however, but that version along with Mario Kart 64 are regarded by many as inferior to the original Super Mario Kart – therefore meaning that I only like crappy versions of Mario Kart, which in my opinion is most of them.

WHY DOES THIS NOT EXCITE ME LIKE IT SHOULD…..

THE PLAYSTATION VITA – Seriously I am about as unexcited about this as I am excited to be getting a new motorised polisher for my car. The 3DS died on its arse when it was launched and only now, because of Mario releases, is it beginning to get noticed. Time will tell on the Vita but for me it’s not something I care two jots about.

N64 AND PS1 GAMES – Some of these games look absolutely  horrible now compared to when we first came across them back in the day. Two examples spring to mind – Turok on the N64 and Spiderman on the PS1 (Probably because I have played these two fairly recently). When Turok first came out it was well received but playing it now sees you running round in a foggy atmosphere with not much going on. Ditto for Spiderman which is ruined by some god awful polygonyish graphics at the start of the game. I know it’s meant to be a comic book but some of this is barely playable. Why have games like these aged so badly? Are they now more unplayable than less technically advanced games i.e. Frogger? Pop a PS1 game in your PS3 and you’ll soon find out.

IT’S TIME TO RUMBLE – SOME REASONS WHY SOME THINGS ARE BETTER THAN OTHERS (AND OTHER FANBOY ARGUMENTS)

WHO WOULD WIN A FIGHT BETWEEN :

C64 V SPECTRUM V AMSTRAD

The C64 had the most awesome music chip of all time
The Amstrad came with a green screen monitor
The Spectrum was responsible for a whole generation of gamers and coders

RESULT : I like music so the C64 just takes it from the Speccy

MEGA DRIVE V SUPER NINTENDO

The Mega Drive came in black whilst the SNES was sort of beigy cream
Sonic AND Mario – two killer games and practically inseparable
The SNES had Mode 7 tucked away to give some fairly impressive 3D stuff
The Mega Drive was the console which revolutionised home gaming and had at least a 12 month head start on the SNES

RESULT : Close to call but I’d have Sega’s black beast winning by a nose

AMIGA V ATARI ST

The Amiga, while occasionally suffering from lazy porting of games from the ST, was superior in graphics, sound and capabilities
The ST was crap

RESULT : Duh…...

GAMEBOY V GAME GEAR V LYNX

Although the Game Boy was monochrome it actually made the portable gaming market its own – and came packaged with Tetris
The Game Gear ate batteries and was the size of a small house
The Lynx did exactly the same as the Game Gear, and didn’t even have a TV Tuner

RESULT : Are you mad ? Game Boy by a distance

PS1 V SEGA SATURN V N64

Sony showed that you could make games using CD’s that were pretty good
The Saturn suffered because it was too late to market, causing irreparable damage to Sega
The N64 was hampered by being cartridge only which came in those silly cardboard boxes. Some games needed you to invest in an expansion pack because the cartridge was bigger in memory terms than a stock N64 could handle

RESULT : No looking beyond the PS1 on this one. The N64 comes a close second though.

DREAMCAST V PS2 V XBOX V GAMECUBE

The Gamecube and the Dreamcast could not play DVD’s
The XBOX was made by Microsoft, which in turn wasn’t all that bad a thing as people made out at the time
The PS2 was first to market, took hold of it and never let go – they were still making games for it in 2011 – and it outlasted all it’s rivals
The Gamecube never took off after a lacklustre launch
The Dreamcast never took off because Sega were last to market and despite making a damn fine machine, had no takers
The XBOX was made by Microsoft which turned out not to be as good a thing as people made out at the time

RESULT : PS2 takes it with the rest fighting amongst themselves for second place.

The following reasons are why Mario is better than Sonic, and why Sonic is better than Mario – at least, for arguments sake, that will give you something to mull over until next time :

It's the battle to end all battles, the rage in the cage, the rumble in the jungle - but who comes out on top ?

MARIO IS BETTER THAN SONIC because : He collects coins, thus ensuring a wealthy journey through his adventures. Sonic collects rings, which unless they are made of a particularly valuable metal, mean that they are worthless.

SONIC IS BETTER THAN MARIO because : He gets there quicker. Seriously if you were hanging around waiting for Mario to show up then you would be waiting a very long time. I am surprised the Princess never died of old age. There is an art to arriving early and with Sonic’s speed he will always be there on time.

SONIC IS BETTER THAN MARIO because : He wears the coolest looking training shoes. Mario wears dungarees which weren’t even fashionable in 1985 when Super Mario Bros arrived on the NES. Mario also has one of those dodgy 1970’s porn film moustaches which, being a plumber, means he may have a second career on the side we don’t know about

MARIO IS BETTER THAN SONIC because : When he opens his mouth he sounds like he looks i.e. A stereotypical Italian. When Sonic opens his trap he sounds like a 7 year old boy, and has done so for many years. It might be a nice idea to have Sonic’s vocal chords be a little more masculine in future

MARIO IS BETTER THAN SONIC because : The spin off games involving Mario and his supporting cast – Mario Golf, Mario Tennis, Mario Kart and Mario Party – are considerably better than Sonic’s – Sonic Spinball, Sega Superstar Tennis, Sega All Star Racing and Sonic Shuffle.

SONIC IS BETTER THAN MARIO because : His animated TV series didn’t have a couple of second rate actors pretending to be Mario and Luigi in some poorly scripted inserts before the low quality animation kicked in.

MARIO IS BETTER THAN SONIC because : Mario games make Nintendo consoles. Super Mario Bros was given away with the NES, whilst the third game in that series is one of the greatest games of all time. Super Mario World, again, was bundled with a special version of the SNES. Mario 64 launched the N64. Super Mario Galaxy is going to be a future classic on the Wii and the new Super Mario World 3D is going to shift a lot of handhelds. Sonic no longer has a console to call his own and despite games like Sonic R on the Saturn and Sonic Adventure on the Dreamcast being rather good, both those systems died a death.

SONIC IS BETTER THAN MARIO because : He is just so much cooler than Mario. He’s the sort of character who you want to hang out with. Mario isn’t all that appealing and to be honest when all your best friends come from some fantasy world you have to keep visiting then you can’t be all that popular in the first place.

The battles shall of course rage on and the arguments shall continue, but one thing is assured : Mario & Sonic are probably the two most identifiable characters in video game history and shall forever be associated with it. In some ways that’s a pretty damn good thing…….

A quick look ahead to some of the fun things that are planned here for Retrosection in the next 12 months. Of course there will be other bits and pieces but the idea is to have a nice them for each month. Read on for more details….

12 months is a long time in video gaming...........

Each month this year I am going to have a theme each month. It will be devoted to a different console/computer and it’s games. These will as always take a random form of selection but will also allow me to include all my favourites and a few obscure ones as well :

NES JANUARY CLASSIC : Focussing on Nintendo’s grey box of magic, which whilst not my favourite machine of all time, was more or less responsible for kick-starting the video game craze again after the traumas of 1983

FEBRUARY FREE FOR ALL : Completely random games across the board and from all sorts of places and areas. This will be a lot of fun as I shall be going into unknown waters. Where possible I shall try and avoid any of the other machines making up the 11 other months of the year

MEGADRIVE MARCH MADNESS : One of my favourite consoles, the Mega Drive was one of the machines I was lucky enough to own first time around. Plenty of arcade and original classics and I shall really enjoy giving them a whirl

AMIGA APRIL APOCALYPSE : The first proper computer I ever owned and the machine all my mates had when we went to big school. It will at least give me the chance to dig Kick Off 2 out again – and maybe Sensible Soccer though that is a BIG maybe…..

MASTER SYSTEM MAY MAYHEM : I prefer the Master System over the NES for reasons I cannot actually explain. It will be interesting to see by the end of this if that is very much still the case

N64 JUNE JAMBOREE : My second favourite console of all time. From the moment I first played Goldeneye I was in love with the machine and for me it is the best console Nintendo have ever produced

DREAMCAST JULY JUBILEE : A very underrated console which suffered from release delays and a market which by that point had lost it’s trust in Sega following the launch disaster that was the Saturn. This though for me is probably my favourite Sega console of all

PS1 AUGUST ARMAGEDDON : Some of the games have aged terribly but you cannot deny that the PS1 was something of a phenomenon when it launched. It gave us a new player in the games market and a little grey wonder with some fabulous games

XBOX SEPTEMBER SMASH-UP : Like the Dreamcast, I have always felt the XBOX was underrated and under-appreciated. Yes it weighed a tonne and cost a bomb but it had massive potential. Give me this over the 360 any day

GAMECUBE OCTOBER O.M.G. : You can argue all you want but I class the Cube, XBOX and PS2 as retro simply because I do. The Cube suffered from a lack of decent launch titles and no DVD facility so gamers stayed away and picked up PS2s and XBOXs instead. Its a shame because as we shall find out there were some awesome titles for it

SUPER NINTENDO SUPER NOVEMBER : I had a lot of exposure to the SNES growing up so it does have a fond place in my heart. Most of those involved being pummelled on Street Fighter II but not all the memories were as bad as that

PS2 DECEMBER DEMOLITION : To finish with, arguably the greatest console of them all ? Well we shall see but with a massive back catalogue which is still being added to a trip through some PS2 awesomeness is most definitely called for.

Taz and Retrobear share a few things in common. They are always hungry, both hideously ugly and both amazingly hairy. It seemed only fair to look at Taz’s first platform outing on the Mega Drive and find out if the rave reviews on release were still justified 20 years later…..

That is the worst case of indegestion I have ever seen

I love cartoons, not sure I have mentioned that before. Not the modern day rubbish you find polluting our screens on some obscure kids satellite TV channel. I am talking about proper cartoons – Tom and Jerry, Yogi Bear, Scooby Doo and Looney Tunes. It’s the latter I probably love the most, with humour so far ahead of its time, wacky characters, insane violence and some high quality animation. No cartoon studio captures the spirit of what a cartoon should be more than Warner Brothers so it comes as no surprise that at every opportunity they will license their characters to video games.

There are literally far too many to mention and as a result of that I am going to focus on Taz-Mania which was released on the Sega Mega Drive. Incidentally this is not to be confused with the SNES game of the same name, which was totally different and thus vastly inferior to this game. At the time Warners had created a brand new cartoon based around the Tasmanian Devil, his family and friends and this game tied in nicely with that.

Lush graphics make the game feel like it was lifted straight from the TV series

You all know Taz, he’s the unpredictable, loud, always hungry, scruffy looking monster that tried numerous times to eat Bugs and Daffy in the 1950’s. Now back in his homeland of Australia (giving the Americans enough ammunition to take the piss out of the Aussies whenever possible), Taz was strapped into yet another platform game based around his adventures. Taz sets off an a quest to find the mythical lizard egg which will feed a family of Tasmanian Devils for a year. All he has to do is simply walk, jump or spin his way through various levels, avoiding spear chucking bushrats amongst other things while eating everything and anything he can along the way. He can’t eat everything though and eating something that doesn’t agree with him will result in a bellyache.

The first thing that strikes you about the game is how beautiful it looks. At the time it was one of the most stunning games to look at on the Mega Drive. It really captured the feel of the cartoon so well. In fact it may have been this that blinded a lot of the positive press at the time. Strip the lovely visuals away and you are left with quite annoyingly bad sound effects and twee, inappropriate music. Taz is well animated, as are the other graphics but the whole thing moves at a snail’s pace, even when Taz is in spin mode. Finally the whole thing is just too damn easy. My bad games playing skills are well known but even I was able to get quite far into the game after a few goes, and that doesn’t bode well.

As good as it looks, Taz-Mania plays like any other platform game of its era and has nothing to make it stand out from the crowd

Throw in yet another linear platformer and all Taz-Mania has to stand out from the crowd is its looks. Its a real shame that revisiting a game I quite enjoyed as a kid now finds it in a state where it can have no real place in gaming history. Sadly the bad games for Taz didn’t end there. The afore mentioned SNES game was a 3D running game which has no redeeming features whatsoever. Taz Express on the N64 wasn’t much better, going back to the tried and tested formula of platform gaming, and ends up being a poor man’s Mario 64 type game.

Taz-Mania sadly isn’t the licence it should have been. If you have fond memories of this from your childhood, keep your distance and hold on to them

VERDICT : At the time, stunning visually. Now, its exposed for the shallow platform game it was at the time. A real shame.

NOTES : Taz-Mania can be found for around £2.00 on Amazon and 99p on eBay.

TBC : Put together time and crisis and what does that give you – Time Crisis on the PS1

Thanks Maz, it's good to be back....

I made a promise a few months ago to keep coming back and posting stuff on a regular basis. Shortly after that I decided to do a piece on Football Manager and that’s pretty much where I have been since. Yep I dug out FM 2055 and have spent a lot of my spare time playing that.

Therefore I am devoting some of my run time each day to sit down and play one game for each day in November. It could be any format or any genre (not football management as I have had enough of that for now) but that’s my aim. I’ll post my thoughts on here when I have played the game and let you know how I get on, and also anything else that springs to mind.

So RetroSection still lives, it’s just the Retrobear needs to sort himself out a bit better in the future…..

The farce is strong with this one......

At the beginning of June at E3 2011, Microsoft announced the launch of a Limited Edition Star Wars XBOX 360 Kinect Edition. So for all those hardy souls out there who have dreamed of having a 360 in the same colours as R2D2 with fully functional sound effects and a gold C3P0-like headset as well will have had all their Christmases come at once. For the rest of us it simply translates as the Newly Repackaged Microsoft More Money Please 360.

Put it this way – I couldn’t think of anything more unappealing. I remember when The Phantom Menace was due for release and collected enough Pepsi wrappers to send away for a Limited Edition R2D2 digital clock. Which was all it was except it was shaped like R2D2. Nothing special in the slightest, other than a lifelong addiction to Pepsi and a few more £’s in George Lucas’ wallet.

So colour me totally uninterested in the latest attempt to get gamers to part with their cash in these hard times for something which other than looking slightly odd is no different from the XBOX 360 currently on the market. I am sure if they had put some fangs and dripping blood on it they could have marketed it as the Twilight 360, proving that it will work with anything and anyone with half an inkling of interest in the subject matter will happily fork out for it. Did I mention it will set you back around £350 notes when it comes out ? Did the 360 cost that when it was originally released ?

That's one freaky picture, but hopefully you get the gist of the argument

Which brings me to the point of this article – dress up any old console in some flashy new designs, colours, packaging etc and someone will be in the market for it. As follows :

• The Nintendo Gameboy was repackaged into a smaller version which took only
  

  Quite literally fits in the palm of your hand - a true handheld

  2 AA batteries as opposed to 4. It then had a colour version brought out for it which was backwards compatible with all existing software. Nintendo then brought out a Pocket AND a Micro version of the same system. The Gameboy Advance was a more powerful console but you could still play the old games on it.

• Sega repackaged both the Master System and the Megadrive into slimmer, more cost effective items. The consoles did the same things as before, they just were smaller. To the collector and misty eyed game fan nothing is better than
  

  Megadrive Mk1 and Mk2 - you're a fool if you go for Mk2

  playing on originals of both those machines, hence why they are more collectable. It should be added that Sega produced a Master System add on for both the Megadrive and the Game Gear, allowing you to play Master System games on those consoles.

• The Amiga 500+ was slightly more advanced than the Amiga 500 (more

  memory and a slightly faster processor). The downside to this was that a lot of the existing software wouldn’t work on it. The same with the Amiga 600, which did have software compatibility issues but not as many as the 500+.

Even the French loved the Amiga.... yes the French..... I know I can't believe it either

Usually a new console means new features and is a step up from the previous machine. We should not forget that the 360 came to market nearly 6 years ago, which is a heck of a long life span for a console. Aside from Kinect and a slightly bigger hard drive, there has been no advancement in the next generation of consoles from Microsoft. Nintendo have already announced their follow up to the Wii, and in the 3DS have moved their handheld technology on further.

I’ll finish with a note on the Konix Multisystem which should have launched in the early 1990’s, and you may or may not have heard of. This was meant to be the next big thing ; a hydraulic arcade chair with steering wheel, flight sim and dual joystick adaptors to fully bring home the rush of playing something akin to Afterburner whizzing around in the chair in the comfort of your own home. Owing to a lack of support from some major software houses and severe financial problems, the Konix never actually made it to market. Too much too soon perhaps ? Maybe, but no one has attempted anything like it since. Don’t get me started on “gaming chairs” because that’s a totally different thing.

Just about the coolest system never made

Change is good – sometimes. I know this 360 thing is limited edition, but really unless you don’t have a 360 and are craving one or you are the biggest Star Wars freak this side of Mos Eisley I really don’t see how this can warrant anyone’s attention. My advice – buy a P3S instead. Or a PS3 and a Wii and you might have some change left over for the Star Wars Blu Rays coming out very very soon.

PS I should point out I don’t have anything against Microsoft or the 360. I had an original XBOX and made the choice to go with that rather than a PS2, and think it’s a fab console. I just don’t like to see something repackaged and then charge you, the consumer, a wad of cash for what is basically a 360 with R2D2 knobs on it.

Remember – you can polish a turd as much as you like, but at the end of the day it’s still a turd……

Keep on buffing.....

]]> https://retrosection.com/2011/uncategorized/retrocomment-a-sheep-in-r2d2s-clothing/feed/ 4 https://retrosection.com/2011/retro-reviews/retro-reviews-odds-sods-bits-and-bobs/ https://retrosection.com/2011/retro-reviews/retro-reviews-odds-sods-bits-and-bobs/#comments Sat, 02 Jul 2011 10:28:02 +0000 http://retrosection.com/?p=359 You can almost smell the retro in the air. The insane on screen action of an arcade classic, another crappy film tie in and the return of the Blue Blur. RetroBear trips the light fantastic and goes on a well timed rummage through some of the games in his collection…..

You'll never know what you'll uncover - possibly a lost classic, possibly not

So here’s a rundown of what I have been playing in my hiatus that I have erroneously (and much to the frustration of Mrs Bear) forgotten to write articles about :

• Outrun 2 on the XBOX – Wow now this is a quality title and far, far better
  

  Revising an true arcade classic and making it as good as the original

  than it deserves to be. You know when sequels to classic games come out and everyone thinks there are a bit “meh” – well not this one. The only thing missing is the sitdown hydraulic cab and the wind blowing through your hair. It has the original arcade version of Outrun 2 as well as challenge stage games, where you perform challenges in order to unlock the next stage. There are over 100 of these to complete so it will take some doing. It’s tremendous fun and definitely worth your time to dig out and play.

• Billy Hatcher & The Giant Egg on Gamecube – Created by Sonic Team
  

  This is the result of a games designer on a cheese induced dream

  and looking every inch a Sonic game (minus the hedgehog), this is a stunning looking and playable platform game that has you coming back for more. The fact you are dressed as a giant chicken and can roll eggs at your enemies, and the whole thing looking and sounding beautiful, this is one great game of it’s genre. I play a lot of platform games but this is one of the best, so track it down and give it a crack.

• PGA Tour Golf II on GameGear – Well I like golf games and I don’t give the GameGear enough love. I played the original series a lot on the Amiga and
  

  Taking minature golf to a new level

  MegaDrive and this is a surprisingly accurate conversion of those games. It takes a while to load each screen but the playability is still there. It proves that the PGA series was (and still is under the Tiger Woods banner) the best golf game around, which is tough on Leaderboard but the difference between these two series is massive.

• The 2D Adventures Of Rotating Octopus on PS3 – OK so it’s not a retro
  

  It's awesomely good fun

  game but this doesn’t mean it can’t be included here. A real cute colourful puzzler and right up my street in terms of the quirkiness and “one more go” factor that you need. The fact it’s available as a PS3 Mini goes to show that great games can be found and downloaded for very little cash. Seek this one out and I’ll guarantee you’ll be hooked.

• Smash TV on MAME – If anyone played this insane shoot em up back in the 1980’s then you’ll have fond memories of trying to stay alive. Given the
  

  Unfair ? Yes. Unforgiving ? Yes. Awesome ? Very.

  amount of enemies on screen at any one time it’s not easy. In fact it’s insanely difficult. That doesn’t stop it from being a real trip down memory lane, with it’s digitised speech, rotating firing system and distinct resemblance to The Running Man. Play this one and see how hard games were back then.

• Sonic Generations Demo on PS3 – It looks like Sonic with better graphics,
  

  Sadly the jury is still very much out....

  it sounds like Sonic with it’s Green Hill theme from the original game and it plays like Sonic (collect the rings, jump on the enemies, get to the end of the level as quickly as possible), and I know it’s a demo, but something isn’t right. The framerate is choppy so everything seems blurred and you can’t just bomb through a level. There is more strategy involved and that’s not really in the Sonic tradition. Hopefully the finished article will address this but it seems to have divided gamers already meaning Sega have their hands full in sorting out the wrinkles before release. File this under intrigued but not that impressed. Stay tuned for a RetroBear Retrospective !

• WCW Mayhem on PS1 – The slowest wrestling game of all time. God it’s
  

  Love wrestling ? You won't love this

  bad, it’s no wonder they went under in the end.

• Batman & Robin on PS1 – Probably the worst film licence game I have ever
  

  The film was bad enough - this however is worse.

  played. Well at least the music is OK as it’s lifted right from the film, but the rest of it ? Unspeakably awful in every respect (still it was only 20p from the car boot – yes I may be a self-righteous prick but I’ll leave it to you to work out who got the best deal from that transaction)

• Streets Of Rage 2 on PS3 – An awesomely good beat em up available on
  

  Two of my favourite things - Streets of Rage 2 and the PS3

  PSN for a short while (thanks hackers). I still prefer the original though but as a button bashing trawl through the mean streets it’s a good way to while away a couple of hours whilst thumping the shit out of everything that comes at you.

We’ve been taking advantage of the free stuff that Sony have allowed us access to thanks to the hacking issues they had a few months ago. I do hope PS3 users took the time to explore their machines it more detail – Blu Ray, video streaming etc – to see what a marvellous bit of kit it really is. Sadly in this day and age and with technology moving at such a great speed something like this was inevitably going to happen. I don’t think any of us were so blissfully unaware at how lax Sony and their security systems were to let it happen though. Let’s hope lessons can be learned and it doesn’t happen again – in the meantime though enjoy the freebies !

As you can see, a wide and varied selection of games. Do give the Octopus a go if you have a PS3 – in these days where you are being asked to pay £40 notes a game you could do any worse than throwing a couple of quid at that one.

Good old Sony.